Ive created a kind of environment
where everyone;
those who i care about
those who dislike my personality,
just look at me
& i feel like they wonder
Wonder what im thinking
wonder why im acting the way i am
but i've made it clear to myself
i dnt act to please others everyday
I try to make myself happy
Now, that doesn't mean
i dnt wanna see you happy
or that i wont be there when you need me
So if ive hurt you
i apoligize now
& just in case i hurt u in the future
without realizing it
i apoligize now
Because nothing hurts me more
than seeing those i care about hurt
Words help express feelings
so i should put my thoughts as words
but:
its better to leave bad things unsaid,
if its not a good comment keep it to yourself,
No secrets,
Be honest to those around you...
So if ive created
any type of hostility,
please understand
im stuck
i feel confused
& even though
maybe i can't do this by myself
Ive been trying to
Cuz this world
kicks and punches
and the problem with that is
that it happens when you least expect
so it may have created
an Insecure, unstable me
& someone who tries not to feel as much
& someone who feels out of place where she used to fit in
& a person who used to love but now resents.
But if others can do it
Why cant i
why cant i overcome these small things
ive seen people go through worst
& i wouldn't want to be there
I'm scared of being there
Losing out on life
Losing those i love
losing on the chance that could be right infront of me
So i thank everyone
Those who knew when;
to push me foward,
to let me make my own choice,
to just stand by me,
to just let me see what was going on,
to speak to me about life,
to change the topic,
to let me cry
to cry with me
to "slap some sense" into me
to wait for me with open arms
but i'm sorry
for many things as well;
pushing you away,
when you tried to help
not knowing what to say
regreting things
& most of all for not being there for you
But how can i help others
when i dnt know how to help myself?
" as we go on, we remember,
all the times we had together."
True isnt it,
But how many of us regret?
& what do we regret?
Somedays i regret,
Regret not spending time with friends,
Regret making certain choices,
Regret making choices b/c of the wrong reason
Regret being mean,
Regret being too nice,
Regret the loss of friends
Regret not being a better friend
Regret not helping as many people as i could
Regret not being more involved in life
Regret not paying more attention to life
Regret not always saying what i thought
Regret saying too much
& regret hurting people
But most of all i always regret
regreting all of these things
Because they've made me, me
They've made me stonger
& as i keep on living
i will keep on crying
i will keep on smiling
i will keep on laughing
& not only for me
But for those i Love
For those who Love me
These people that i will always
thank god for putting in my life
Because be it from your life or mine
We Always learn from each other
We grow because of each other
It's not always true
that friends are people you use
Even family can be used
But if you really care
You truly care
even after you mess up
no matter who it is that messes up
(You, me, me, you)
no matter who thinks its wrong or right
we should
& hopefully will always
Stick by those who care about us
Stick by those we care about
Because thats what lifes about
Living it to the fullest with those you care about....
No matter how hard it may seem
no matter what we learn on the way
no matter what steps we take to get to where we wanna be
Life is too short to not enjoy it
& it would be too boring without those important people
& without realizing it
we may take everything for granted
so i dnt want to make any one feel unappreciated
Cause i know the feeling
yeah i been there
it doesnt feel great...
I appreciate every single one of you
even if i may not say it often
you have helped me grow,
& i thank you
Thank You
Thank You
because i know i dnt say it enough
♥
